Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Protect your necks, here comes the swords !! swish swish

OHHH how doest thou love me darling porkster??

Bless his weakened heart. He was very nearly left be-headed this afternoon.

I sincerely tried to retract my claws and fangs, swords and guillotines.



But of all things holy, all i did was say hello where u been ??? and the boy felt it necessary to immediately diiiiig deep and find maybe ONE thing that could possibly set me off and he succeeded..

Commence be-heading. I felt like Henry VIII set out the immediate order himself for my dear Porky and did my dearest Porkster run ? hide? quiver in fear? say his last prayers of redemption??

>
*caption: Chomp the motherfucker!

NOOOOO no he did not, he immediately became like Wolverine from the XMEN and his steel claws also came out!

Next thing I knew it was a full on , hair pulling , screeching , bitch slapping , pissing contest.

First please note this has been a hell-acious week for me - I am not looking for pity at all , nor compassion .. but when I clearly hang the Warning Sign up and next to it a white flag ... that could only mean KEEEP OUT or risk losing your beloved head..

I am absolutely loathing in self misery as my sweet cherished kiddos are in PA visitng their father leaving me as a walking zombie becuz even one day away from them tears my heart up.

Secondly , the boyfriend is MIA - as in I effin HATE YOU Iraq with a passion
All communications have been lost there for the last 3 days every hour that goes by feels like an eternity plus one day.

Thirdly , yesterday I woke with a full blown killer migraine - and was in the worst of excruciating pains .. anyone who has ever suffered migraines knows there is nothing worse than a full blown migraine which is more than just a wicked headache, it started off that i was blind , the throbbing in my head was SO bad i could not even get out of bed to get some meds or pee.

- EW no i didnt pee my bed -

I went back to sleep till i was ready to explode lol- also the lovely accompanying migraine affects include nausea hot and cold shakes extreme sensitivity to light and sound and over all readiness to devour anything or anyone who dares to bravely come within 2500 feet of you.



I would rather any other part of the body be in pain over a migraine - and i can talk from experience as i have severely suffered pain elsewhere and have had migraines since i was 20 yrs old.

Also what happens after a full blown migraine is equally miserable the massive head pain typically simmers down to a miserable lighter aching throbbing annoying persistant biotch of a mofo. The day after the initial full blown migraine is usually followed by what I have dubbed as the Migraine hangover a headache which no meds will take away ( it will try to keep it at bay) , but it stays and aches and hurts and makes you utterly miserable.

So to my sweet bestie who is oh so not scared to lose his ever loving head to the queen of mean .. thank you for always sucking up ur blood for me and hanging in there :D

I heart u
bestie ...

13 comments:

PorkStar said...

Oh good lord yo, don't get me started. All I did was open my filthy mouth and said maybe they pulling out of Iraq blah blah... but being you is a bit loony and shit, I knew I should have not opened pandora's pie hole. Now being that I have gone through so many decapitation episodes, I feel numb to the blade of the guillotine and so I rebel, and answer back and launch vile back so as to avert my head being chewed off... i put on a whole Dragon ballZ on your skinny ass!

All in the name of friendship.

hehe and i love the last pic...

: )

Unknown said...

You have a lot on you mind, it's only normal to be a little pissy.

I think Porky should apologize and send you flowers....or chocolate or alcohol.

;)

GET ON THAT PORKSTAR. ;)

rachaelgking said...

At least you have a loldog to make you feel better... ;-)

headbitingprincess said...

@Stacie's !! LOL u Rock girl !!!!! ty

@Lilu ... tru i have my horse/ bear puppy .. so thank you for that !!!

Steve said...

Yeah I've dealt with cluster headaches for a few years now, so believe me I understand. I'd rather get stabbed again than have to deal with one of my headaches.

Organic Meatbag said...

Besties...aren't those the name of crackers in Eurasia? Oh no, wait...Atlantis destroyed the continent of Eurasia many years ago...my mistake!

headbitingprincess said...

HA ha ha ha ha ha ha
ohhh Meat .. u are too flubber-tastic-ly funny.. if that be the case i guess we had better ship my friend back to Atlantis .. always thought he was odd !!!

@HHH .. OUCH !!!! I can sympathize your pain .. I need to go into politics .. i feel that such pain should be outlawed ... directly after working Mondays !

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