Monday, March 30, 2009

Welcome to maniacal MONDAY !!! oooh how i LOVE my kids


OK so right .. check this out ... there are so many things in life i adore .. mondays ...mmmm not so much *crinkles nose* but i love today .. i love every day !!!!!

I would love to sit here and write something that would crack you up and send you to the floor in a roar of laughter .. but today ... i sit here to write you a little about how the innocence of a child has floored me ..

Over the weekend we went to the grocery store .. and of course my tiny tots are having a debate in the back seat ... i let those 2 fight out what they can before i step in ( like my parents did wth me .. at least these 2 arent beating the crap out of each other .. imagine having 5 brothers tag team against you for a little Filet Michele.. i miss those days wouldn't change them for the world !)
oops sorry back to present day !

as we are getting out of the car and walking to the front porch ... my son made a comment to her saying that she just got lucky .. that quick witted brainiac retorts back without skipping a beat ..
" so what I dont believe in luck or karma" this my friends grabbed my ear like a pissed off mommy and pulled me to her .... i slowed my pace so that i could walk with her .. my curiosity has been piqued !!!
I say to my 2nd grader ... babe .. what do you mean you dont believe in luck or karma
(now i teach my kids to freely think .. so if she doesn't wanna believe in luck etc more power to her ..
as long as she is not being sandbagged into believing or not believing --
oh shoot now i will have to call myself a damn hypocrite!!!
since i made her believe in Santa and tooth fairy etc .. ok well i will wrestle my conscience another day .. i keep side tracking here.. hush..

i ask her what i did and she says .. look Mom I just dont believe in luck and Karma ..
Me: Why not though?
Lulu: well because there is no such thing .. you create it in your mind .. you create your own fears and by believing in luck and karma you create fears that you live by instead ..
the child stopped me in my tracks , i kid you not .. i stopped walking .. for a 8 yr old to have that kind of depth and understanding of fear or whatever .. just blew me the heck away !!
I still am ... I dont think i EVER thought about fear or luck or Karma in that sense ..
i mean i used to before that day believe in karma and luck and God and fear
its kind of hard to undo the way you have been all your life but i sure would like to try
as for my little Lulu .. I will continue to encourage her to live without fear

as a parent we tend to think that only WE are the teachers ..
i promise if you are open, it is a 2 way street ..
my kids have taught me such incredible insights .. i love it
I have been so blessed ..
yes a tad sentimental today for my life lesson learned..
but lets see what i can add in for a funny !!!

lets go with a CLASSIC :
Satan in Church

A few minutes before the church services started, the congregation was sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the back entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon the church was empty except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.

So Satan walked up to the man and said, "Do you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
"Aren't you afraid of me?" Satan asked.
"Nope, sure ain't." said the man.
"Don't you realize I can kill you with one word?" asked Satan.
"Don't doubt it for a minute," returned the old man, in an even tone.
"Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying AGONY for all eternity?" persisted Satan.
"Yep," was the calm reply.
"And you're still not afraid?" asked Satan.
"Nope," said the old man.
More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for 48 years.
==== ))))))

Friday, March 27, 2009

its Frankly Friday !!!!

WELL GOOOOD Morning world !!!!

Frankly .. today is Friday .. and I am so close to losing my ever loving mind ... there is nothing better then waking up the last day of the work week a little itsy bitsy late so you have to rush like a headless hen !!

Even though the rain has slowed up my after work activities ( aka baseball practice for the kiddos) this week has not been slow for me .. I have misplaced my magic wand .. This weekend poses so much more for me to complete
Fixing taxes ( way to go me !!! who screws up filing taxes online !!!!!)
Dad is coming tomorrow into town to visit us !! with Uncle Bob woo hoo!! for a week ..
house cleansing is needed .. need to hire a crew !!!!
And with the rain and giant German Shepherd comes lots of muddy paws on my light tan rug .. and floors and mud on walls .. how on earth she gets mud on the walls is beyond me .. she musta taken lessons from Lexi Lu
this tan rug is being replaced by hardwood floors - i shall be shopping for those floors this weekend and installing asap.

Kids have opening day for baseball , shopping for food is needed and I am getting satellite installed this weekend buh bye gay cable !

Man i am hunnnngry like a hippo !! think i will go make some yum yum oatmeal after this coldplay song is over ..

SOOOOOO got us a funny one ... I know i had to write all the stoopid boring stuff first sorry

Darling Daughter has a tooth to put under her pillow for the tooth fairy Weds night ..
Weeellll her tired tooth fairy fell asleep soon as she was done putting the muchkins to bed
and woke up forgetting all about it .. well DD ( Darlin Daughter) sure didnt 4get

I was absolutely put on the stand and prosecuted !!!
Lulu: WHY didn't the tooth fairy come !?!!?
ME: I immediately respond wth : She couldn't make it to your pillow , your room was too a mess ( truth)
Lulu: immediately fires back - That's a lie .. she came last time and my room was a mess ..
Me: Quickly I fire right back , well i stopped her this time and told her to wait till ur room was clean ..
well let me tell you what .. those kid freakin geniuses are wicked quick and u cant get a doggone thing by them ...
in my defense i tried to illusionate her .. and as Collin Raye sang .. that's my story and i'm sticking to it !!!
soo comes Thursday night and we are going for second time on TFairy .. I told her this time i will keep under my pillow since she hasn't cleaned her room .. i was almost beheaded again as i woke her up .. WELL !??!!? Did the tooth fairy come yet Mom ??? *in my head i hear * SON OF A BISCUIT !!!!!!!! did i mention we were running a tadpole late .. as i make like a river and run for the wallet before she sees me !!! Good thing I have Ninja like skills .. waaapoosh !!!!

Frankly my dear .. its Friday and i just dont give a damn !!

WOO HOO hope yous guys have a wild weekend =)

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Twinkle Twinkle its THURSDAY power !!!!

Righty'o .. so here i sit writing this and in my head its narrated in my British accent ..

Today maybe your TMI Turkey day .. have at it .. Ive got nothing .. may need some time to warm up to that since .. well anyways right then moving on !!

Busy day from Hades ! Im going to be someones snack if i dont get a move on ..
it is not that im not working .. I AM .. and shocker # 2 .. we only had 2 engineers here today ... so that means ... not as many people to interrupt me and need me .. but for some reason there is still SOO much to do .. and as noted in Twit my tweet Its 4 pm ish and i just got me some lunch.. soooo right ... back to busy .. snap back to reality , whoomp theres no gravity , whoomp she's so mad that she , pooomp bust a cavity

lata yooo ; )

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Holy Armadillo's - I saw the light !!!

so hi .. how ya doing ?? You having a great hump day ?? I hope better than mine just was.. and get this ... I'm soo not complaining .. I am more leaning towards "Thank u baby Jesus" .. for reals yo ..

OK so right .. check it out .. its like this ..

I had to take my little munchkins to the dentist - whoo hooo hooo !!
so after an hour and a half of the dentists, it is finally time to return the little ones to school ..
I had just left the dentist office .. and ahem for you doubters I was NOT speeding ( yet ) #1 I had my kids in the car.. and at this point of location it was not somewhere to speed ( red light to red light short strip) sure I have a heavy foot, but I'm not a blockhead Charlie Brown.

So here I am just starting on the road from red light 1 to redlight 2, its a 2 lane highway .. Im in the left lane (aka passing lane) when this megabeast SUV decides to speed up and "merge" into my lane .. I use the word "merge" lightly as the driver NEVER checked any mirrors .. nor did she check anything at ALL , to see if anyone was in the lane .. so she swerved and nearly clipped my black stallion .. Now when you are almost in an accident you do not have time to think .. kay .. u just react .. aprrarently my skilled driving senses kicked in .. i throw the car into Nuetral ( it's raining out and didnt wanna Hydro .. also to help slow the car faster than down shifting.. since this was an emergen-fckn-cy stop) i slam on my brakes hard as i could since i had literally a millisecond to stop from being hit and not just hit .. she was going to take my baby girl out.. becuz she was speeding up and aiming for the passenger side rear door.. to avoid the hit i had to drive into oncoming traffic lane to NOT get hit...lucky for me they were still sitting at the red light..

First I wanna say to BMW engineers .. u guys friggin ROCK .. brake test CHECK !!!! good to go .. Now .. had i not had my kids in the car.. i woulda let the motha fockin megabiotch hit me .. becuz then I would have new Blue Bmw car !!! and i think for me the priceless part of it all was the blank expression on her face when she finally saw us (& my lil Lexi lulu in her bright pink rain coat) .. the driver I swear said with such melancholy (I read lips) "oohhh" like she was drugged and it was delayed and drawn out .. her eyes didn't pop out of her head !! she didn't shriek or gasp or act surprised!! ...

This my friends is what made me wish no kids were in the car .. then and there i woulda let her whack a mole my car .. but everything happens for a reason - so i shall take another deeeeeep.. breath... mooooshaaafa ... and exhaaale .... whoooshaaaaa ..... and again thank the heavens above no harm came to the children today ... but know this .. in my head - i massacred the drivers head i didnt just bite it = ) muahahahha ok and then I said sorry so I don't burn in h e double hockey sticks !!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Brand spanking new


here goes my first post and ....

Im an el tardo...mmkay

test one two, one two...

Busy coming up with something witty and fresh to say... but then again it's almost midnight and I'm so completely horny tired from a long, long, loooooong, day of work, and running kids all over the earth to baseball practice - I am not complaining I would drive them to China for practice if thats where it was .. I love those monsters with every fiber.

Shit coming up soon, I promises.

Note to PorkStar, you'd better help me out with this shit.! muah